Overheard: Miguel Tejada is 100 years old

The interwebs are abuzz today with word of Miguel Tejada's age-based revelation.

My first reaction: I bet the Orioles are happy; Tejada was only 31 when they traded him. Once he went to Houston, he began aging in dog years or something.

"I'm old enough to be your poppy, Papi."

You know, I've always liked Miguel Tejada. He plays hard, he has fun and he's pretty darn good. Good note for up-and-coming ballplayers: Do those three things and I'll be a fan. I'm pretty easy that way.

"You traded me where?"

I suppose I'm a softie, but I can certainly understand why Tejada would have lied at the time he signed his first deal as a teenager in the Dominican Republic.

"I was a poor kid," Tejada said. "I wanted to sign a professional contract, and that was the only way to do it. I didn't want or mean to do anything wrong. At the time, I was two years older than they thought."

That reminds me: why are Dominican players such free swingers? Because you can't walk off the island.

Classic.

Lying about your age is wrong, no question. But let's call it a youthful error in judgment. There are certainly worse things you could do.

Whoops.

UPDATE: Tejada went 3-for-4 tonight with a home run, upping his season average to .328. Maybe he was relieved to have the monkey off his back?

Steak at Stake, Chapter 3

For the newbies, here are the Steak at Stake ground rules.

Update: Much like his opponent in this wager, C.C. Sabathia sucks.



You heard me, big man. You are costing me steak.

Last night, Sabathia gave up 9 earned runs on 8 hits and 5 walks in just 4 innings to raise his season ERA to 13.50. His season line is 0-3, with 32 hits, 14 walks, 27 earned runs, 5 home runs and 14 strikeouts in 18 innings pitched.

Players in contract years are supposed to be motivated, and Sabathia could be costing himself a shot at Johan Santana money. However, those with steak on the line look at Sabathia's early troubles and recall the more than 250 innings he threw last year, playoffs included.

About that, I have only one thing to say: Eric Wedge, I know where you live.

Cleveland, right? You live in Cleveland? Yeah, I thought so. It makes sense. I mean, you're the manager, you would pretty much have to live in Cleveland. At least during the season.

Thanks for your time, Mr. Wedge, I'm glad we could settle that.

It's easy to get bent out of shape by a series of ugly starts, but we are after all talking about a mere 18 innings, which isn't really enough data to judge. In today's Baseball Prospectus ($), Joe Sheehan argues that this four-game stretch really isn't out of line with the worst four games Sabathia has thrown in any of the past four seasons.

It's a valid point, but he probably doesn't have steak at stake.

Sky High Sky Sox...

...come crashing down to Earth.

Or do they?

The Colorado Springs Sky Sox are the AAA affiliate of the Colorado Rockies. As such, Sky Sox players are both very near and very far from fulfilling their major league dreams.

Denver:



Colorado Springs:



As a paper boy, it's in my nature to be fascinated by the thin line between triumph and setback. One morning you're rolling down the road like it's paved with rubies; you've got the papers nestled between the doors or in the old milk chute before sunup, before Old Man Jenkins can even think about sicking his man-eating standard poodle on you. The next morning, it's a sixty page insert and a black sky that reads 'paper boy struck by lightning.'

So you'll forgive me if stories like this strike a chord:

Before the game, National League championship rings were presented to 10 Sky Sox players for their contributions to the 2007 pennant won by the Colorado Rockies. Six others connected with the Sky Sox or Rockies also received rings.

The ceremony - and the game's first pitch - was delayed 32 minutes due to the late arrival of Rockies owners Charlie and Dick Monfort. Making the trip with the Monforts were assistant general manager Bill Geivett, director of player development Marc Gustafson and Walter Sylvester, an assistant in player development.

I mean, there you are, a fairly successful minor league ballplayer knocking on the door of the Major Leagues. Even so, you're one step ahead of most of your teammates; you're one of the lucky few, you've tasted The Show. Sure, it was ten days in May, but you've seen guys you know, guys you shagged spring fungoes with back at Hi Corbett Field in Tucson, get to the World Series. Now you've got a taste for it. You want more.

So it's a new season and you're back in the minors, working your butt off, biding your time, but wanting more than anything to get back to Coors Fields, wanting it more than sex. One night at the old ballpark, you're reminded of just how far away it all is. The owners and the suits in the front office drive down the interstate and you get your NL championship ring, a standing ovation, and the envy of anyone you've ever met. And then you look up and you're playing the Tacoma Rainiers in front of 1,826 fans at a charming little grotto called "Security Service Field".




How do you get up for that? Isn't that the letdown of all letdowns?

"It was a great honor to get (the ring)," said Sky Sox center fielder Cory Sullivan, who had two hits and two RBIs. "It was exciting. All of us feel like we earned it."

All five Sky Sox starters who received a ring - Sullivan, Ian Stewart, Seth Smith, Sean Barker and Joe Koshansky - either scored a run or had an RBI.

Smith, who drew three walks to contribute to the team's league-leading total, said, "We would much rather have been at Coors Field (in Denver) with the rest of the guys to get the ring but it was nice. It was like a late Christmas. The big-league team got their's about two weeks ago.

I'm impressed that all five starters who got bling had a run or an RBI. I guess you don't get that far by worrying a lot about how close you came or what might have been. You don't focus on the fact that you're down in the bus leagues now, you remember that you made it to The Show and you focus everything on getting back.

I guess that's why they're playing in the Pacific Coast League, with one eye on the National League West, and I'm stuck here in my Mom's basement stuffing newspaper inserts.

Man, I don't like the look of that sky.

Still Watching

Boy, Jeff Keppinger is making me look pretty good. He's also making the Kansas City Royals look pretty foolish.

Let's have some fun with small sample sizes, shall we?


Data set 1: Jeff Keppinger, starting SS, Cincinnnati Reds
2008 stats: 47 at bats, .340/.396/.532, 2 HR, 8 RBI, 1 SB, 7 R


Data set 2: Tony Pena, starting SS, Kansas City Royals
2008 stats: 27 at bats, .037/.071/.037, 1 hit, 2 RBI (he's clutch!), 1 SB, 0 R



Transaction involving these two ballclubs: Royals trade Keppinger to Reds on January 10, 2007 for Russ Haltiwanger


I was going to post Russ Haltiwanger's minor league numbers this year, but frankly I'm kind of tired of piling on Russ Haltiwanger. Though I do enjoy saying his name. Haltiwanger.

What was I talking about again?

Oh, yeah. Tony Pena. He's not good.



Number one in your program, number forty-seven in your heart. Tony Pena.

What Do Al Kaline and Justin Upton Have In Common?

We’re back again, with a totally contrived creative and enlightening statistical comparison between Justin Upton and the greats of baseball past.

This has quickly become a regular feature, partly because Justin Upton is just that kind of prodigious talent and partly because my friends at Fox Sports Arizona can’t seem to stop coming up with this stuff. I call Daron Sutton and Mark Grace my friends because they come right into my Mom’s basement to tell me about every Arizona Diamondbacks game with insightful commentary and infectious enthusiasm.

At any rate, the complete list of all players to hit 5 HR in their team’s first 11 games of a season before the age of 21:

Al Kaline, 1955

Miguel Cabrera, 2004

Justin Upton, 2008

Good on ya, J-Up! Throw some lumber around, young man.

Bonus coverage: Let's not forget the awesomeness of Miguel Cabrera, who was recently traded to Kaline's Tigers:



"Okay, we've been traded to Detroit. Now, D-Train, I'm your friend, I'm only going to say this once. I've got a lot of friends in Detroit - Ordonez, Guillen. When we get there, it's really important that you...how do I put this? That you stop the sucking."

I Swear I'm Not Making This Up

Sorry for the light blogging recently, I've been doing a double paper route with my friend Billy in the hospital for mono. If I find out he's been kissing Jenny Ipswich, I'm going to egg his mom's Buick.

Here's a fun piece of trivia for you - and, just to be fair, I'm going to utilize my multi-farious blogging skills and hard return like 67 times so you can't see the answer from the question. Here we go:


Q. The NCAA Division I college baseball record for scoreless innings by a pitcher is 47 and two-thirds innings in 1994. Who holds the record?
























Hint: You know, I've already gone to the trouble of typing the word "hint" but I just don't feel like giving you one. I will say this: if you care enough about baseball to be one of the three or four people reading this, you've heard of this guy. He's a big name and he's still playing in the MLB. Okay, that's sort of a hint.





















Give up?








































A: Todd Helton.


Todd Helton? Seriously.

I think it's pretty well known that that Helton was a college QB at Tennessee. Maybe a little less well known is that Helton was the starter before he got hurt and gave way to Peyton Manning.

But I had no idea he was a pitcher. No. Idea. Though I guess the idea of a college quarterback who played baseball being a good pitcher isn't exactly crazy. You know, now that I've had some time to think about it.




Number two in your program, number one in your hearts. Todd Helton.

Overheard on Extra Innings: Mike Marshall Had A Rubber Arm

This one's a couple days old, but worth the wait.

On Thursday's broadcast of the Padres-Astros' game, the Channel 4 San Diego broadcast team of Matt Vasgersian and Mark "Mud Cat" Grant were reminiscing about bullpen usage patterns in the past. They invoked the name Mike Marshall, and suggested that he used to pitch nearly every day out of the bullpen for the Dodgers. [Incidentally, there was another Mike Marshall who also played for the Dodgers, but was a hitter.]

Finding this to be an unlikely scenario, I checked my old friend Baseball Reference, which revealed the following: in 1974, Marshall made an incredible 106 appearances for the Dodgers, logging a totally insane 208 innings out of the bullpen. He went 15-12 with 21 saves and a 2.42 ERA. Along the way, Marshall won the National League Cy Young award and finished 3rd in the NL MVP voting.

208 innings! Out of the bullpen!



Nice chops. Marshall should have gotten MVP for the facial hair alone.

208 innings in 1974 was his high water mark, but the year before was nearly as impressive: 92 appearances, 179 innings pitched. His record was 14-11 with 31 saves and a 2.66 ERA. He was 2nd in the 1973 Cy Young voting and 5th in the NL MVP.

I sit, stand and kneel corrected. Hats off to Mark "Mud Flaps" Grant - I will never doubt you again. I searched for a picture of Grant under "San Diego broadcaster" and came up with this. I assume it's him - it says Channel 4:



That guy on the right looks familiar. I think he used to be the distributor for my paper route. Or something like that.